It’s a new month, and, even better, it’s one of my favorite months of the gardening season! In May, the tomatoes get moved out from under the basement lights and out into the garden. I’ll plant the cucumbers, zucchini, and beans that we’ll be eating for most of the summer. May is a good month.

Aside from garden goodness, I am looking forward (OK, I’m practically jumping up and down like a preschooler) to seeing “The Avengers” on Friday. (Anyone else dying to see it?)

And, on Saturday, my baby girl turns four. Four! Right before she was born, I had just finished up the long, terrifying (for me) process of trying to win my job at About.com. I got the job, had a baby, and came right home, writing as much as I could to get my new site off the ground. I don’t remember most of that period of time, to be honest with you. (Also, having a baby on Cinco de Mayo brought more than its fair share of “I bet you want a margarita right now!” jokes from hospital staff.)

The lemon balm and oregano are already starting to reach monstrous sizes.

So, yeah, this is going to be a good month. I haven’t been here writing a lot, but I’ve been busy. In addition to my work over at About.com, I’ve been working on a couple of my other blogs (Gardening in the Mitten, my Michigan gardening blog, is one that I’m determined to put more regular work into) and still plugging away at the novel I’m writing.

Here’s a hodge-podge garden update. Now that we’ve reached the glorious month of May, I’ll try to write here more often. In no particular order, here are a few things that happened this month in the garden:

1. We bought and planted an ‘October Glory’ maple tree near the kids’ swing set in the back yard.
2. We’ve been eating spinach, leeks, mesclun, and scallions from the garden since the beginning of the month.
3. We have currants growing on the clearance currant we bought last fall, tons of strawberry blossoms, and plenty of good growth on the raspberries and blackberries. It’s going to be a good fruit year, especially if we manage to protect some of our apples from the apple maggots this summer.
5. The dandelions….they are out of control this year. Holy cow.
6. The tulips bloomed, to reveal that most of what I planted last fall had been dug up by squirrels.
7. The common lilac is nearly done blooming, but the dwarf Korean lilac is just starting. I am really happy we planted both — lilac season just isn’t long enough.
8. There’s a vendor who sells lovely little herb plants at Eastern Market. Thanks to him, the herb garden is going to be awesome this year. I had my eye on a few more things I want to pick up next time we go.

That just about does it. I’m looking forward to a good gardening year!

So why is it that all I can see in the garden this morning is the mess? Weeds are everywhere, thanks to our recent, bizarre March heat wave. I think we lost the variegated lavender I bought last year. The area behind the garage, which we’ve designated as a berry patch/perennial area (read: low maintenance but still productive) is a complete disaster, with dandelions and crabgrass growing up through the mulch and Queen Anne’s Lace popping up everywhere.

I have always been big on seeing the beauty in our gardens, on not comparing ourselves to anyone else or trying to live up to unrealistic expectations. I still believe that. But I’m also frustrated with the fact that my garden, right now, symbolizes every personal failing I abhor in my self. My inability to focus on anything, ever, for more than a few minutes at a time, is represented by the herb starts still sitting on the potting bench, weeks after I purchased them at Eastern Market. My tendency to half-ass things, even important things, is there in the planted and then unwatered area of the garden that was supposed to produce a nice spinach crop. My inability to just decide what I want and go for it stares me in the face every time I look at the bed at the back corner of the house, which is either an asparagus patch or a flower bed, and, right now, is both because I can’t just decide what to make of it.

I know, logically, that none of these things are the end of the world. Spinach seeds can be replanted. Weeds can be pulled. A place can be found for the herb starts. It’s what they represent, right now. I am not happy with where I am professionally. I have allowed my life to become unbalanced while chasing after a dream that may never amount to anything more than just one more in a long line of failures. I feel inept as a parent, every day of my life. I look at my ever-expanding waistline and see more months of failure to take care of the things I need to, health-wise.

And this dissatisfaction over small things bothers me. Because when I look at everything, my life is amazing. I have the world’s best husband. Four smart, healthy, amazing kids. A happy, welcoming home and a garden that feeds my family and provides a haven for wildlife at the same time. Two published books, a dream in and of itself. The imperfections are such small things, and yet, those are the things I focus on.

Any other time, I could overlook the weeds, the mess, and just chalk them up to facts of the gardening life. I would like to get back to that. This focus on failure has, for the moment, taken the joy out of my garden, and, as a result, I haven’t been writing about my garden as much as I ordinarily would in this season of rebirth. I will work through it. I always do. And when I do, I’ll wonder, as always, what the big deal was. The good news is that I know, from past experience, that I’ll come back stronger, better. I just wish it didn’t take so long.

I’m going to take a long weekend off (after today) and relax, and refocus, and remember the beauty that lies in even the most pervasive of weeds. To try and remember that I am not my failures, but that each failure leads to something better somewhere along the way. And, once it’s passed, I will be back to being my normal, passionate, opinionated self.

I’m going to try (try being the operative word here…) to do a regular Friday recap here on In the Garden Online. I’ll cover stuff I enjoyed reading, stuff I wrote, and whatever else I come up with. Hopefully it will be fun. If nothing else, it will give me a chance to go back and re-read things I enjoyed reading from some of my favorite blogs

Stuff I Loved on the Interwebs:

1. Gayla’s post “The Gleaners and I” over at You Grow Girl.
2. Jenna’s post about insecurity, doubt, and the necessity of asking for what you want — “Biting Your Tail” from Cold Antler Farm.
3. Mr. Brown Thumb’s post explaining what P.V.P. means on your seed packets.
4. Dave’s post about five must-have herbs for your garden on Growing the Home Garden.
5. Margaret Roach’s herb Q & A with Rose Marie Nichols McGee on A Way to Garden.
6. 5 Reasons Why Voting and Shopping Are Not the Same Thing by Sami over at TreeHugger.
7. Two words: Juanita. Weasel.
8. This short video spot for our local PBS station featuring Detroit’s Georgia Street Community Garden founder Mark Covington.

Stuff I Wrote:

Here on ITGO:
On Being Stubborn

At TreeHugger:
Interview with Gayla Trail (Again, I would like to emphasize that I did not use the phrase “garden guru.” Editors… )
President Obama’s Proposed 2013 Budget Cuts USDA Produce Safety Testing
Michael Pollan’s “Food Rules,” Animated

At Mother Earth News:
Aphids, and How to Get Rid of Them
Looking Forward to Tomatoes

At Gardening in the Mitten:
Michigan Gardening To-Do List: February

At Grasshopper Hill Farm:
Easy Side Dish: Roasted Garlic-Pepper Potato Wedges

At About.com Organic Gardening:
How to Grow Organic Blueberries

Also this week, we had a sick cat (he seems to be recovering now, though I was afraid this was the end until he saw the vet yesterday) and we’re getting ready for my baby boy’s 3rd birthday tomorrow. I have ‘OSU Blue’ tomato seedlings coming up under the lights, and spinach growing on my kitchen windowsill. And my oldest daughter just finished writing and illustrated the fifth book in her “Hero Cat” series of books (I wonder where she gets her love of writing from!) Life is good

*About the photo: Rosie is the kitten born, then abandoned, in our garden, and we took her in in September. She is a ruthless taskmaster, despises Facebook, and is the inspiration for Emily’s “Hero Cat” books.

I read a post this morning on my friend Gina’s blog, and I started writing her a monumentally-long comment. And I decided that rather than take over her comment section, it would probably be better to post here instead. You should go read Gina’s post over at My Skinny Garden: On Losing Passion. On Quitting. On Going Through the Motions. Go. I’ll wait.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know I’ve gone through periods, especially when it comes to blogging, in which I feel exactly the way she describes. It’s all too much. What is my voice against all of the bullshit that’s going on right now? What does it matter?

It matters because you are you. It matters because your voice is unique. It matters because you care enough to be bothered by the bullshit. And it makes you feel depressed and maybe a little insane, like that lone voice crying out and wondering why you just can’t take photos of pretty flowers and be happy like everyone else.

There’s nothing wrong with pretty flowers. There’s not a single thing wrong with a blog that celebrates the beauty of gardening. But that’s not all there is. We can be admonished to “just focus on the positive!” and “choose your battles!” but this always seems to me like code for “just shut up and assimilate, already.” You write about your roses. And I’ll write about the thorns whenever I damn well want to.

I recently read this post by another of my favorite bloggers, Jenna Woginrich of Cold Antler Farm. She said that a reader wrote to tell her she wasn’t going to read her blog anymore. Why? Because she didn’t want to know anything about the personal side of Jenna’s life on her farm — she just wanted pretty pictures and how-to posts.

Sounds familiar, no?

Just give us the whitewashed version of gardening, just give us the facade of living the farmer’s life. Because if you start talking about things like human rights, or the poisoning of our planet, or loneliness or heartache, you might make someone feel icky. Give us cotton candy, and we’ll go away feeling happy, and tell everyone how wonderful you are!

You know what? Fuck that. There’s enough cotton candy out there. There are enough posts about pretty this and wonderful that. Pretty has a cost, sometimes. And it’s dishonest to pretend that the ugly never happens.

What I’m taking a long time to say is this: be you. Write anyway. Be a stubborn pain in the ass. Make people mad sometimes. It makes you feel alive (as I well know!) And even if nobody ever reads it (though they will, trust me) you know that you had the guts to be yourself. And that, my dear, is a rare and beautiful thing.

(About the photo: The pretty pic of a Christmas cactus does serve a purpose. This single bloom is a tangible example of the rewards of being stubborn. My husband bought that plant over three years ago. It was bashed around in my kids’ room, has fallen off shelves, has been aggressively snuggled by cats, and lost most of its leaves as a result. It’s taken a beating. And I don’t know how many times I’ve thought that I should just compost it and buy one this winter when they’ll be in the stores again. But I didn’t, because I’m stubborn. And this week, I was rewarded with one spectacular bloom. It was worth it.)

Equipment for Sprouting:

My favorite way to grow sprouts is simply in a canning jar with a bit of cheesecloth (doubled) affixed over the opening. However, you can also purchase specialty sprouting supplies, such as bags (usually made of hemp) for sprouting, or sprouting trays or machines. These can be nice convenience items, and I’ve heard from people who love them, but I’m sticking with the jar method.

Search for “sprouters” to find different models. You can also purchase plastic lids that fit on a canning jar, if you’d rather not bother with cheesecloth or straining your water through a sieve every day.

Popular Seeds for Sprouting:

Note: Look for seeds specifically being sold as “sprouting” seeds or labelled “for sprouts.” These are certified pathogen-free. Most seed catalogs carry at least some sprouting seeds; you can usually find at least a variety or two on the seed racks at your local nursery as well.

**Alfalfa
**Radish
*Mustard
**Watercress
**Arugula
**Clover
**Beans (adzuki, black, mung, garbanzo, pinto, lentils, soybeans)
**Peas
**Broccoli
**Cabbage
**Kale
**Mizuna
**Tatsoi
**Turnip
**Grains (such as wheat, barley, quinoa, corn, millet, oata, and rice)
**Pumpkin
**Sunflower

Days from Seed to Sprout:

Depending on the variety, sprouts take about three to seven days before they’re ready to eat. Eat them when they’ve sprouted their cotyledons.

More Articles About Growing Sprouts and Microgreens:

**How to Grow Sprouts in a Jar

**Sprout Safety

**Growing Microgreens

**Five Tasty Sprouts to Try

I’m hoping this doesn’t come across as one of those bragging, “oh, I’m so awesome” kind of posts. I’m much better at making fun of myself than I am at tooting my own horn, so this feels weird to me. It was a good year, and I have very few complaints.

–I had three articles published in Mother Earth News this year. A dream come true.
–I wrote my 2nd book this year, Vegetable Gardening for the Midwest. It will be out next spring.
–I started writing for TreeHugger in January, and I’ve loved being affiliated with such a great site, and such a talented team of writers.
–I continued writing for About.com, which has been a dream gig.
–My garden kicked ass. Except for that one week where the tomatoes got away from us and rotting fruit attracted flies. Lesson learned: tomatoes wait for nothing, not even a book deadline.

So it was a big year. And while the outward signs are pretty awesome, I’m even happier at the other, less tangible things that happened this year.

I’ll remember 2011 as “the year I found my voice.” I’ve been writing for a long time, and I think I believed that I’d figured myself out, at least a little bit, before now. But 2011 was the year I stopped being afraid. It was the year I stopped worrying about being the nice girl, about being that sweet chic that everyone likes. I stopped being opinionated in private and mouse-like in public. It was the year I fully became myself.

I made some people mad. I expressed exactly what I think about GWA and its partnership with Scotts. I declared that I’d be boycotting companies involved in GWA12 in Arizona. I expressed my concerns with gardenbloggers and free stuff, and what I believe it’s doing to the overall image people have of us as a group. Whether people liked my point of view or not wasn’t that important to me. The fact that it was clear who I am and what I stand for was what mattered. And I think that’s probably crystal clear now.

The Power of the Internet

I also used my voice in a way that, hopefully, made things better for some people. I wrote a post over on TreeHugger about Julie Bass, a Michigan mother who was facing a possible 93 days in jail for growing a front yard veggie garden. After we covered it on TreeHugger, everyone from Grist to the Washington Post covered it as well. TreeHugger even commissioned an artist to create posters inspired by the story. The charges were dropped, and I think it was a victory for veggie gardeners everywhere. It was great seeing how many people worked together on that one.

Landreth Seeds announced in late summer that it was in danger of going out of business. Me, Mr. Brown Thumb, and Monica (Garden Faerie) took to our blogs (I wrote on TreeHugger, of course) to try to save this American institution. MBT started the #SaveLandreth hashtag on twitter, which TreeHugger immediately started using. By the next week, the story was everywhere, and Landreth catalogs were being sold at a crazy pace. Today, Landreth is still in business.

Adam Guerrero, a Memphis teacher and gardener, was faced with having to dismantle his urban garden after complaints from a neighbor. Mr. Brown Thumb broke the story, I covered it on TreeHugger, and several other blogs picked it up as well. The judge was deluged with emails and phone calls. Adam’s garden still stands, despite some restrictions. I have a hard time calling this one a complete victory, but again, it was great to see so many people work together on behalf of a gardener.

The point is not that I am awesome or patting myself on the back (I am not. Not at all. Well, maybe a teeny bit.) but that many of us could have sat idly by and just let these things happen. And while many, many people did absolutely nothing to help, the fact that some people made an effort to help made all the difference. Our voices aren’t just meant to endlessly promote ourselves. We can use them for something bigger, something better. And to everyone that did: you completely kick ass.

What’s On Tap for 2012

2012 will be even bigger than 2011. Mark my words. I have a few articles coming up in magazines that I absolutely adore, my book is coming out in the spring, and I have a few side projects that I’m excited about. I have a lot to keep me busy. I’ll probably be around a lot less on Twitter and Facebook. I want to get my Gardening in the Mitten (Michigan gardening blog) site going. It’s going to be a busy, crazy year, but I’m ready for it.

Thank You

This year wouldn’t have been nearly as great without you. Yeah, you. Everyone who’s read my posts here, at About, and over at TreeHugger or Mother Earth; everyone who’s chatted with me on Twitter and FB; everyone who RTed, signed a petition, or shared on FB when I begged — thank you!

Here’s to a great 2012!

Garden Bloggers and Free Stuff

As a garden blogger and professional garden writer, I get probably more than my fair share of free products: plants, tools, books, seeds. I’ve gotten a few big-ticket items, such as rain barrels and compost tumblers. I’ve had companies provide products for giveaways here on In the Garden Online. So I am no novice when it comes to free stuff.

And “free stuff” is at the crux of this latest issue. Apparently, a company provided a blogger with free products. The blogger, who had generally posted positive reviews of this company’s products, published a negative review, pointing out some things that the company should have been grateful to hear about (more on that later). This blogger was essentially “cut off” from receiving further products from that company, and, worse, the company sent other garden bloggers to her post to refute what she’d said in the review.

There are so many things wrong here. But it offers us a good chance to take a look at our relationships with companies, and how to protect our reputation, both in the garden blogosphere and out of it.

Companies That Offer Free Stuff

There are a few things I want to say to companies that provide free products for review for garden bloggers. I think (hope?) that most companies understand this, but let’s go over it anyway:

1. Sending a blogger something for free provides you with two opportunities. The first is to get your name out there when the blogger posts about you. If it is a positive review, wonderful. But it also gives you a bigger opportunity. If they’ve written a negative review, this gives you an opportunity to seriously look at your product. Is it as good as it could be? Don’t write off a bad review just because “everyone else loved it!” Maybe they did, or maybe they were too insecure to write a negative review. Negative reviews are gold. Treat them as such.

2. No matter how much free stuff you’ve sent to a blogger, you do not own them. Ever.

3. Sending products for review does not guarantee that you will receive a positive review.

4. Sending products for review does not guarantee that your product will be reviewed, period. A blogger can choose to write about your product, or not. They are not beholden to you to write about you just because you sent them something for free.

5. Learn to tell the difference between sycophants and honest, objective bloggers. It’s easy for the rest of the garden blogging community to tell them apart. It should be for you, too. If you’re working with the same bloggers, over and over again, you’re not getting a diverse opinion of your products. And you run the risk of only working with sycophants, who are great for giving you glowing reviews, but are generally not respected much in the community at large.

But my concern is less with the companies (who are only interested in their bottom line, after all) and more with garden bloggers themselves.

Garden Bloggers Who Get Free Stuff

1. Getting something for free does not mean you should take to Twitter/Facebook/your blog squealing about how excited you are that someone sent you something for free. A bit of dignity is in order here.

2. Getting something for free does not mean you have to write about it, and definitely does not mean you have to give it a positive review. Write honestly, or don’t write at all. I dislike giving bad reviews. I don’t find them helpful to my readers. So if I don’t like a product, I don’t write about it. As a result, I receive WAY more products to review than I actually write about. If it’s not useful to gardeners, I’m not going to waste my time writing about it.

3. Don’t go on and on about how loyal you are to a company. This may gain favor with the company itself, and with other companies that are looking for bloggers to give them positive press, but it tells the rest of us that you are biased when it comes to this company. And we wonder, when you review other items, how biased you are on their behalf, too.

4. Companies do not give you legitimacy. I’ve seen some bloggers get excited to receive free stuff, and they often make it clear that they feel that, having gotten something for free, they now have some legitimacy in the garden blogging world as well. As if we’re not worthwhile or important until some company deems us worthy of free stuff. I understand. I do. We do this whole blogging thing, often at the amusement of family and friends, watching (maybe) the pennies from Adsense trickle in. Free stuff seems like payment of a sort. And to be recognized by someone else in our industry — well. The only legitimacy we have is that which we strive toward with quality work and honesty. It comes from us, not from someone else.

This situation has become a mess. At this point, how does a reader know which blogger to trust and which is not being objective? How to tell which gardener has devoted herself to servitude to a company, and which one just does her own thing? How to tell who is hoping to be one of the “popular girls” and who is more concerned about being true to herself and her readers? Garden bloggers have created a mess. We are heading down the road that the mommy bloggers traveled before us. And we see how well-respected they are, as a group. Do we want the same for ourselves?

Because if we don’t start acting with integrity, with honesty, and as professionals (yes, even bloggers who aren’t making any money should act professionally!) then that is exactly where we’re headed.

I don’t think I’ve ever bothered to take photos of my garden this late of the year, and I have to wonder why. It’s true that there is less to get excited about; no tomatoes to lust over, no brightly-blooming cosmos or zinnias, no butterflies or dragonflies. It’s easy to see the “blah” side of November.

But I love this time of year, and you know me: beauty is what you make of it, right? After a tour through my garden, I’m appreciating November more than ever. Take a walk with me!

The side yard garden, which was home to melons and squashes this year, is home to a few small spinach plants and the borage, which just doesn’t seem willing to phone it in just yet. We’ve been shredding leaves and dumping them onto these beds — still working on turning the clay soil into something resembling “fluffy.” The bamboo fencing is a new addition — we have it elsewhere in our yard, but thought it would be rude to put it up since we talk to the neighbors on that side. But, they’ve moved, so up the fence goes. Privacy! — and a nice clean slate with no garbage cans or hose reels in my line of vision — yay!

I love the fall color on red twig dogwoods. Wow.

We’re still getting raspberries! This is a real treat, and I love walking through the garden and snagging a few to snack on. I’m loving the contrast between the bright red berries and the yellowish-orange foliage. Gorgeous.

Back near the garage, we have one of our low tunnels up, and I’ve planted garlic in part of the other raised bed. Under the low tunnel, we have spinach, radishes, and mesclun.

The lavender is finishing up for the season. I actually cut quite a bit to dry, but I wanted to leave some for the bees. Now I’m really glad I did — the color looks so pretty with the red and yellow leaves that have fallen in the yard. In the background, the framework for another low tunnel. There is lettuce, spinach, and carrots in that bed.

The marigolds that I planted in two of the raised beds are still blooming, if looking a bit ragged. I’ve collected tons of seeds from these, and could still collect more. I’m glad I didn’t pull these out when I cleaned out the rest of the bed.

Brussels sprouts! These grew wonderfully for us this year. I’ll be harvesting these for our Thanksgiving dinner.

A view of the front yard. Not much going on. The Joe Pye weed is still blooming, and I love the way the grasses blow around in the breeze.

In fact, I’m pretty sure I grow ornamental grasses because of how awesome they look in autumn. I can’t walk past them without running my fingers through the fluffy seed heads. And the color is so pretty and fall-like.

Burning bush is another one I grow because I love how it looks in the fall. Look at that color! And I didn’t mess with the contrast or anything — this is just how it looks. My mother in law hates this shrub. With a passion. Though that could be because her next door neighbor has an unpruned one that is taller than their house and looks like something from “Nightmare Before Christmas.” But I love mine.

So, there you have it: my garden in November. November is about the details: a pretty leaf, a few berries, the last viburnum leaf clinging to a branch. Things we’d never notice unless we really looked for them. Not a bad life lesson in general, come to think of it.

What do you love about your November garden?

The other sign that Halloween has passed us by is the sight of dozens of carved, soggy, perhaps squirrel-chewed Jack O’ Lanterns sitting on the curb. Much like my obsession with leaves, I confess to wanting to give people who throw pumpkins away a good talking-to. Nearly half of all U.S. households carve a pumpkin every year (at least one!) That’s a lot of waste if even some of us just toss them in the garbage. So rather than raving like a lunatic, I’ll post some constructive ideas here, instead.

10 Ideas for Recycling Your Jack O’Lantern

1. Chop them up (I just use a shovel) and toss them in your compost bin.
2. If you like squirrels, leave the pumpkin out and let the squirrels devour it.
3. If you have a worm bin, cut your Jack O’Lantern into smaller pieces and give it to the worms. They LOVE pumpkin, in my experience.
4. Via my About.com colleague Melissa Mayntz, cut it in half and use it as a bird feeder.
5. Chop ‘em up a little and place them at the bottom of a lasagna garden or new raised bed. (I think just about every raised bed in my garden was started on a foundation of old Jack O’Lanterns and fall leaves.)
6. If your Jack O’ Lantern is still pretty fresh (not moldy, soft, or smelly – meaning you just carved it in the last day or so) you can turn what’s left into pumpkin puree. Just remove any soft spots, wax or soot from candles. {You can also turn your puree into pumpkin butter — yum!}
7. Pamper yourself with a pumpkin puree pedicure.
8. Puree the flesh, and make your own pumpkin body moisturizer.
9. Bury it. If you’re not starting a new garden bed, you can dig a hole in an existing bed (perhaps you’re planting some trees, shrubs, or perennials anyway?) and place pieces of the pumpkin in the bottom. Instant boost of nitrogen and organic matter!
10. Science experiment. If you have curious kids, just let the Jack O’ Lantern sit in your yard for as long as you can stand it. Let them note all of the fun, gross things that happen to a pumpkin as it decays: the mold, the sogginess, the eventual collapse into itself. If you think ahead and happen to set your Jack O’ Lantern on top of your compost pile, you won’t have any slimy clean-up to do afterwards!

So, no more Jack O’ Lanterns on the curb after Halloween, right? Right.